Carmen's House

Hello world！

chensiyufish — Tue, 04 Jan 2011 22:36:22 +0000

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Dying Rose

chensiyufish — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 02:27:22 +0000

Dying Rose

Within there is the ache
Pain and sadness no one knows
Daily I slip and fade away
Like falling petals from a dying rose

Wounds invisible so profound
Intensely searing and will not heal
Though I’ve tried for so long now
Yet the pain I can’t conceal

With a tremulous voice I call
From behind the wall of tears
Just pleading to be heard
Please understand my fears!

Can you feel the silence?
But do you hear the pain?
In between the thunder
And the pouring rain.

Night skies so dark and lonely
Heavenwards I look north east
Searching for that one bright star
Where upon my eyes could feast

Is my search but all in vain?
Is it no where to be found?
Heaviness within my heart
Lament and sorrow there abound

在伦敦的第一个生日

chensiyufish — Sat, 08 Nov 2008 03:24:39 +0000

非常非常高兴。

伦敦持续2周的坏天气，到了今天忽然转晴。

所以说，真是我的幸运日。

11月7号。

和妈妈一边视频一边化妆，老妈还帮我挑耳环，一开始说那耳环太大，等我换了对，又说还是第一副好，我就说么，哈哈。

妈妈说真高兴有你这个女儿。

我听了真的很开心，你知道吗，我不在她身边，当她告诉我她生病了，我真的真的不能照顾她，不能陪伴在她身边，感觉太糟糕了，我真的不是一个好女儿。

可是当她这么对我说，我很高兴。

还有今天Shanks告诉我，他有了一个很好的女朋友，大大的好消息，他也是孤单太久了。他说我们是“SOUL MATES”，哈哈，灵魂朋友，这样翻译对不？哈哈

今天约了班里的同学去海德公园野餐。秋高气爽，环境真的很美。所有的叶子都红了。

晚上还和几个好朋友在SHISH喝了几杯小酒。

开心，又有点失落。

想念所有的老朋友。

回家的路上一个人，真冷清。

希望不久的将来，能有个人陪我回家，就算是flatmate也好啊！

联合国开学了

chensiyufish — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 23:52:10 +0000

10月6号秋季开学，从第一天开始，就由4位导师轮番轰炸，布置了7个brief，算项目计划吧。

我一方面怕漏听重点，一方面又不免好奇打量周围的新同学。各种肤色，各种发色[真的是各种，还有粉红的呢]。

头两天主要是课程介绍，资源介绍，还有设备介绍，同学也没什么时间多交流，50个人被分成A，B，C，D四组，分别做课题。

今天是第三天，也是最有价值的一天。每个人都要做3 mins presentation, 5张图片的限制。虽然只有3分钟，可是每个人都挑选了最能代表自己的东西，我觉得这是最好的一种交流方式，不仅是学术上的，同时也可以感受到每个人的独特个性。在身边的同学身上就可以学到很多，这种感觉是备感压力的，大家都那么优秀，有时候看到喜欢的作品，真是不自觉喝彩，感叹不愧是圣马丁的学生。然而要看完所有人的作品，真的是足足一整天。

我们整个MA Communication Design系有50多个学生，4个专业：摄影，平面设计，插画，多媒体。

我原本以为我会是摄影专业里少数的女生，哪里知道今年不知怎么的，8个全部是女生，其实今年只录取了6个学生，我和另一个学生是去年录取的。目前知道有2个法国的，一个德国的，我是中国，另一个女生是台湾的。

现在介绍‘联合国’成员：英国，中国（台湾），韩国，日本，泰国，迪拜，俄罗斯，意大利，法国，德国，西班牙，土耳其，希腊，冰岛，巴西，美国，还有的国家忘记了。我想也只有研究生课程可以汇集那么多国家的学生了。

下课后，系主任邀大家一起去“Princess Louise”，终于有机会和别的同学交流了。上了一整天的课，努力拍手拍到手心痛，下课后到酒吧里继续喷，真是身心俱疲阿。

50多号人，浩浩荡荡，把酒吧2楼全部塞满，还附加好几个课程导师，自动分成小组，或者围成一桌，或者站着，自我介绍，然后开始客套，喷完以后，起身，换桌，继续喷。9点我实在撑不住，就回家。

明天晚上还有聚会，而且还是写在课表上的，继续bollocks，英国人喜欢bollocks，只要是在酒吧，就是bollocks time，虽然这个词意味着胡说，但我个人觉得当英国人用时，大多表示为闲聊，gossip。

新家2008.9.7

chensiyufish — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 15:46:18 +0000

新的家，一切都是新奇而美好的。

努力让这个房间更有家的感觉，昨天是中秋节，去了一个佛教徒聚会，在一个小公园举行的野餐游园会。有乐队，有家庭成员包括儿童，还有专门的烧烤人员。

一进这个小公园，感觉像进了另一个远离尘嚣的世界。真有仙境的感觉，门口就有3，4人拉手风琴，还是古典音乐，哇塞。

回想最近去过的几个节日。诺丁汉狂欢节就在其中，这个节日是伦敦最大的节日，吸引成千上万人参与。我拍摄了不少照片。过些天上传，先上我新家的照片。

reflect

chensiyufish — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 20:41:15 +0000

WEEK ONE : New
Life

I still remembered my first London trip
clearly even after one year.

I found London to be a victorious prince
charming and I felt like a butterfly winging my first flight. I think when I
caught the sparkle of London at first sight, I fell in love with him. I decided
I have to live here for the artistic breath.

Now I am here, excited, expecting, but
my heart is crowded with complex feelings.

I have to thank my teacher Mark who was
considerate towards all of us fresh birds. He gave everyone a questionnaire,
and we had to help each other finish it, it made us closer. In my first week, I
met with new classmates and teacher.

My new life was emerging.

WEEK TWO : Breath

It was a relaxed week, we learned
British geography, local knowledge, the form of words and how to voice your
opinion. It was very simple but useful to us.

WEEK THREE : Challenge

From this week we had to face a new
challenge—a weekly test. The first examination was group discussion. Our topic
was “censorship”. What we had to do was made a standpoint list and talk with
other group members. We tried to create ease and reduce tension, but it did not
work.

WEEK FOUR : Shock & Confusedness

What a great and unexpected shock! I failed my discussion test, which I
never thought I would. The worst thing was that our whole group failed, and if
we failed again, we might have to go home. This caused me so much stress that I
could not sleep and my mind was racing.

The other thing that confused me was why I could not ask for help with
my writing?

I would like asking help when I am stuck, that is how I develop myself
and learn.

WEEK FIVE : Self-reflection

The British educational system is totally different to my country,
which has it’s own censorship in assessment. Not until now do I really
recognize a truth that British people do not mind how many mistakes you make in
your work, however, they do care about your real ability. Just be yourself, and
you will be fine.

A midsummer night dream

chensiyufish — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 23:41:51 +0000

Since 10th June, I already staying in London 19 days.

Studying, going exhibition, traveling London, visiting friends are my total life.

It is not a long time, but I really did something interesting, and that surprised me.

EVENT 1:

21th June Sat, a very special day because have the longest day and shortest night in whole year.

Shakespeare’s Globe Theatre putted on "a midsummer night dream" in midnight.

The building like a tower, every wood, carving, step, seat and painting on the wall have several centuries’ history.

When I sat in the theatre and
enjoyed drama, I felt like falling into old times.It will be more
nature if I dressed like a classic lady.

EVENT 2:

Viktor & Rolf exhibition in Barbican.

They taken the fashion world by strom with their particular blend of cool irony and surreal beauty.

They dressed doll like a real
model when they have a special work, my favor show are the Black light
collection, Flowerbomb collection, Bedtime story collection, Bells
collection, etc.

Genius!

EVENT 3:

Steven’s House.

There had a crazy party in Steven’s house this weekend.I tried yo dress myself up as"Egyptian dressed Qipao".

The ground and first floor is exhibition room. An old piano inside in case people tails up.

Second floor have a living
room, dinning room, bedroom and a bake veranda.Dinning room’s middle
ceiling make a big glass and you can see the plants on terrace.I can
image there must be bright in day.

Third floor is a big garden.

So many bizarre sculpture, masks, crosses and paintings, Man-ray style photos, various classic mirrors.

The whole building is a museum.

People dancing, talking in here, I cannot believed it was used for church’s boy club.

Maybe one day I can have an exhibition in here.

The bloody ELUPP course

chensiyufish — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 22:41:37 +0000

I almost cost 2days about to wait my ELUPP course starting.
It is such a bloody issue, yesterday check in, alright, it should be, but today, still talking information,bra bra bra.
Considering to buy a scend-hand computer, saw the sale notice in LCC students’ broad.
Now still using shanks’ computer. No Chinese, so, everybody, forgive me.
Tomorrow have a crazy party for new students who study in UAL.
Meet a new friend come from Japan.
Bloody tired.

又到伦敦

chensiyufish — Sun, 15 Jun 2008 12:48:17 +0000

6月10号，大日子，又一次飞回伦敦。

阳光明媚，shanks大老远从西北部来接我。

久违的朋友，瘦了好多，估计是练网球瘦的，去网球俱乐部时候，害得我也蠢蠢欲动。

俱乐部里有个小女孩，个子小小的，发球看起来超级凶猛，一问才知道，居然在伦敦少年组比赛排名第4，牛。

嘿嘿，在俱乐部还认识了一个叫valerie的女孩，她在kinstone读书，很热情，还邀我一起去找工作。

来伦敦的第3天，也就是周4，又跑到慈善商店工作了，还是那一帮子人，不过有了新的朋友加入，而且shanks不做经理了，新的经理有点怪。

还见到了sladiyana.刚看到她在外面，我就冲出去了。

嗯。shanks住很开心，他老是摆弄他的非洲鼓，各式各样的，还让我用他的混音装置，聽音乐实在是太完美了。

现在我是住在他家起居室兼音乐室的地毯上，真是很幸福啊，四周都是乐器，虽然不会玩，看看也觉得热闹。

对现在的我来说，头顶有瓦就很开心了，尤其是又和那么好的朋友一起生活。

周末我有点发傻了，误把周六当作周五，结果误事了，还好不是很严重，就是没有和妈妈联系。

而且，在出门见朋友的时候，把钥匙忘记了，害得我有家回不得，差点成无家可归的流浪猫，shanks他们又在外地演出。

还好被冯冯同学收留，真是我的英雄啊。

今天就可以回家了。

嗯，明天就开学，嘿嘿，要辛苦了。希望见到有趣的人。

失眠夜——倒数第5天

chensiyufish — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 19:13:10 +0000

辗转不能入睡，离别前夕的夜晚大概就是这样。

叙旧，筵席。

挂念明天该做的事，离开的准备还未完成。

似乎还有太多的事没完结。

家里的彩绘还没完工，爸妈卧室的纱窗还没请人做，还没教会妈妈用电脑收邮件，还有相机配件没有买，离开以后一缸鱼该怎么办？家里的二宝一直等我回家怎么办？万一什么电器出问题要怎么联系维修？要交代的事情太多太多。

朋友永远都有叙不完的旧，爱情也不知漂到哪里，为家人，为朋友，为曾经爱的和现在爱的，有太多的遗憾。

我总是后知后觉，都临要走了，才开始思乡情切。

连昨天是佳佳的生日都给忘了，临到黄楼看到人家送她的礼物才反应过来，真是个糟糕的朋友。

冬瓜哥哥在宁波的公司开张了，希望顺利淘金，等我从伦敦回来要来给我买部夏历。

峰宝宝也不知啥时候回来，回来后要开开心心过日子。

少杰要快乐的生活，并且永远保持锐气。

佳佳可千万别在我回国前结婚，我还想当伴娘。

蚊子和央央要互相加油，一起挺过创业的初期。

朱姝7月从康定回来是见不上了，你是我们寝室4个人里最有勇气的。

P猪你要坚强勇敢，答应过的事我不会忘记的。

沙龙和张翌永远幸福。

茜茜，博文，谢惠都要乖乖的，姐姐会给你们带礼物的。

Joel，想我的话就飞过来吧。

Gustav,在中国找个好姑娘吧。

Seumas,你到伦敦来我会考虑敲你一顿的。